#ocadoandchill

This week the lovely man left for America, so in a frankly pitiful attempt to take my mind/heart/soul off of him I went back to Tinder, which kind of felt like taking a job in Sports Direct when you used to manage a football club. 

So my first foray back in to dating and it lasts a total of 32 minutes and ends with the most alarming text message I’ve ever received. 

We meet at the tube station after he declined my suggestion to meet at a pub, and he asks if we can go for a coffee as he’s not drinking. 

“Sure” I say, “there’s a lovely independent coffee place over the road.”

“Nah, there’s a Costa just here. Saves crossing” he replied. 

Like seriously? I put on eyeliner for this and now I’m in a Costa bloody Coffee.

 After 25 minutes of ‘normal’ conversation we have the following exchange:

 Him: “Have you had dinner yet?" 

Me: "No I came straight from work." 

Him: "What would you say if I offered to cook you dinner?" 

Me: "Ermmm…right now? 

Him: "I only ask because I’ve got an Ocado delivery coming tonight." 

Me: "I’d have to say no. I couldn’t possibly go back to the home of someone I’ve literally just met, sorry." 

Him (talking over me): "lots of nice fresh vegetables and good fish." 

Him: "OK well I’d better go. Need to be home for the delivery." 

Me:….

The birth of #OcadoAndChill

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So we walk back to the station, say our goodbye’s, then this happens:

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Yes you do decide yourself what to do with your money, and last night you decided to spend it on a coffee. I don’t come with a money back guarantee. Dates aren’t commodities. 

I actually felt angry, because as you’ll know if you read this blog often, I am a massively big believer in women always offering to pay for dates.

His response is just beyond me!

UPDATE: What happened next.