Kim Scott, the author of Radical Candor, Be a Kickass Boss Without Losing Your Humanity, knows it can be painful to be a boss, especially when you have to fire someone. Getting fired is painful, even traumatic. It can cause financial hardship and damage a person’s self-confidence. Scott knows the power of asking the right questions when making a tough decision like this.
She recalls having to fire an employee who wasn’t performing as expected and whom she liked personally. She was nervous when the meeting started. Then it got worse. After she said he had to leave the company, this soon-to-be former team member, asked “Why? You never told me I wasn’t measuring up.”
Scott who has managed teams at Google, Apple and Silicon Valley startups, realized he was right. Why hadn’t she told him?
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Instead of asking herself radically candid questions, she told herself lies, the kind we all tell when we’re afraid to fire people. Here are three big ones: 1) It will get better, even though you know in your gut it won’t; 2) Somebody is better than nobody even though you know that team members are carrying the load he can’t carry; and 3) Firing is bad for morale, even though you know that this person is damaging team morale every day.
Why did Scott fall for these lies? Was it because she liked him or was she afraid she wouldn’t be liked if she fired him? Was she worried he would get angry or cry? Or was it because Scott was angry with herself?
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He was right. She had never told him he needed to improve. A kick-ass boss is expected to give honest, timely, useful praise and criticism to the people on their teams. She hadn’t done this. She had failed as a boss.
That’s when Scott began her mission to create work places of radical candor. These would be known for building trustworthy relationships by 1) caring personally for teams and team members, and 2) challenging one another directly.
In cultures defined by radical candor, teams expect bosses to: 1) give good guidance—meaning honest, timely praise and criticism; 2) build cohesive teams by understanding each person well enough to know what roles will motivate them, and which won’t; and 3) produce outstanding results—collaboratively.
My research over the past two decades to link corporate cultures ranked high in candor with superior market performance confirms the financial value of radical candor.
But what happens when you have given radically candid feedback and don’t see improvement? What happens when the individual ignores the coaching and continues their subpar performance. Scott asks herself three questions before she decides to fire someone:
1. Am I clear this person’s poor performance is affecting the rest of the team? By the time you see this, most of the team has usually known this for some time.
2. Am I certain I have given radically candid guidance? Have I shown this employee that I care personally about her work and life and that I have been crystal clear about challenging her to improve?
3. Who can I speak with who will listen carefully as I talk through what I need to do? This will help me to be fair and also follow company guidelines to prevent potentially time consuming legal challenges down the road.
I remember asking these questions when I led a team of investment bankers and analysts at a top Wall Street Bank. I cared a lot about the team and especially one member whom I will call Ben. He was super smart, experienced and personable. The problem was that he would disappear every day for several hours with no explanation. When I asked Ben about this, he said he business to take care of, but that everything was fine. I began to suspect he had an addiction problem.
I wasn’t the only one noticing his lapses. My boss did too. But he chose to ignore them. One day, I walked into his office and asked if we could talk about Ben’s problem. He said, “Maybe it would get better.” I waited. It did not. So I saw him again. Now he was ready to talk and to take action. The next day I approached Ben and asked him about his absences. Did he have a problem? He admitted he did.
My boss and the company arranged for him to go into rehab. When he came out Ben began working with us again. But then – he left. He realized the high pressure culture in which we worked wasn’t healthy for him.
A year later, he sent me a Christmas card. He was living in New Hampshire, had married his girlfriend, and was in school to become a substance abuse counselor. He sent me cards every year reporting on the counseling practice he built after graduating and also on family milestones. He thanked me for what I had done.
Scott knows that when you fire someone, it’s important NOT to distance yourself from the person you are about to fire. You want to remind her or him they are not “flawed”. Perhaps the position they were in did not bring out their strengths. Can you talk about the kind of job and work where they can thrive? This is a radically candid conversation. It is based on caring personally and challenging directly.
Perhaps it’s not Pollyannaish to imagine that when you fire someone, you will create the opportunity for them to excel doing meaningful work somewhere else. It can happen.
