Taylor Swift just released "Look What You Made Me Do," the first single from her sixth studio album and it's taken the internet by storm. An anthem to looking at things, doing things, and making people look at things you've done, the track teases a darker, more vengeful Taylor than we've seen before.
Obviously, people are hype about this. Taylor's journey through this decade is basically the musical version of Gone Girl we never knew we wanted. Someone please guard Neil Patrick Harris.
Along with Taylor's swift descent into darkness, over the course of the last week we've seen the emergence of a new side to the singer, a Slytherin side.
Embracing the derisive "snake" moniker that Kimye fans gave her during the height of her feud with the famous couple, Taylor has made serpentine imagery central to her promotional campaign. You can even pre-order snake jewelry from Taylor's official site. It's quite an about-face for the "Mean" singer and internet reaction has been plentiful. Missing in the conversation, however, is the sibilant voice of the snake community itself. Obviously, snakes do not have appendages and therefore are unable to tweet. But, it's absurd to think that the county's most prominent snakes wish to remain silent on such a serious celebrity story. One of pop's hugest stars just announced to the world, "I'm a snake now;" but, to paraphrase another iconic musical hit, what does the snake say?
We phoned some of the serpentine community's most famous members to get their takes. Here's what they had to say.
Name: Kaa
Famous For: The Jungle Book
Thoughts on #LWYMMD: I'm so glad you called! This is great. It's such a funny coincidence that Taylor is releasing a song because I'm also releasing a new song. We're basically twins! Anyway, you can get my new song, "Kaa-n You Believe It?!" on Ssssspotify and iTunesss right now. It's a tie-in for my new book, also with the same title. As you know, Scarlett [Johansson] played me in the last movie version but fans, my fans, keep asking me, "What's the real story? Who is the real Kaa?" So, I really didn't have a choice but to write a tell-all. You know, Shere Khan is a real—well, you have to read it. You have to read it. Okay, I've said too much. I've gotta go. Okay, goodbye. What? Taylor's song? Oh, it's great. I love her new hair; it's giving me Mowgli-does-Manhattan vibes. Obsessed. And the song is hypnotic. That's one of my taglines: "It's hypnotic!" Use it, baby! Okay, that's the other line. Bye.
Name: Nagini
Famous For: Harry Potter series
Thoughts on #LWYMMD: Well, to be honest, it's been a little hard to listen to music since Neville Longbottom chopped off my head so rudely, but I can tell this song is a bop. I'm all about vengeance anthems and people giving into their darker impulses and also any song that samples Right Said Fred. Also, this take sort of makes you wonder what Taylor's Horcruxes would be. It's not a bad thing; anybody could have a Horcrux. What would her's be? A guitar, that MTV Award. You know the one. Oh, and Katy Perry. Just Katy Perry. Wouldn't that be hilarious? Oh, I'm bad. I'm terrible.
Name: Sammy the Snake
Famous For: Sesame Street
Thoughts on #LWYMMD: I'm obsessed with this song! OBSESSED! It's the song of the summer at all of our herpetology ragers. The kids are going to GAG over this. I can't wait. These little hatchlings are going to lose their minds over this. The snakes and the tadpoles and even those random lizards that crash our bashes are going to all like to get turnt and do The Worm. We're all getting back together over Labor Day and we're going to blast "Look What You Made Me Do" and just RAGE. The Old Sammy the Snake can't come to the phone right now. BECAUSE HE'S DEAD! (Don't tell the kids; I'll be back at work on Tuesday.)
Name: Malcho
Famous For: Aladdin the Series
Thoughts on #LWYMMD: Honey! Let me tell you, this song blew my entire weave back! I am spent. Taylor did not come to play. She was told by AppleCare and she will not be leaving this Genius bar until someone fixes the cracked screen on her iPad! "Look What You Made Me Do!" I live. Like, what you do, girl? She's walking around her enemies' houses, casually knocking vases off of the mantle like "Oops. You made this happen." Savage. I die. I don't even consider myself part of the snake community but this is still my jam. I have wings, you know. I'm like a bird. I only fly away.
Name: Sir Hiss
Famous For: Robin Hood
Thoughts on #LWYMMD: I deeply identify with this song. Prince John never listens to me even though I always know what's right and then bad things happen and sometimes you just want to shake him and say "Look what you made me do." I'm not your scapegoat anymore, okay? If anything I'm the scapeG.O.A.T., okay? Me and Taylor won't stand for anymore abuse. Ugh, she really knows my heart. She knows my beating, three-chambered snake heart.
Name: Asmodeus Poisonteeth
Famous For: Redwall
Thoughts on #LWYMMD: Who? Look what who made whom do? What has been done? How did you get this number?
Name: Bertrand MacMillan, III
Famous For: Britney Spears' 2001 VMAs performance
Thoughts on #LWYMMD: As I am sure you're aware, I'm a huge advocate for snake representation. I would have loved to see more positive portrayals in the media, but I'm glad that Taylor is embracing this part of the narrative. Being a snake isn't a bad thing, as I wrote in my most recent book Sssssomething Wicked This Way Comes: Defeating the Serpentine Mythos from Eden to Emojis. Of course, I've been talking about this issue since the mid-90s when I was lecturing at Columbia and was a frequent guest on Ricki Lake. Indeed, the only reason I agreed to appear in Britney Spears' performance was to increase visibility for non-threatening snakes. Britney and I had a long talk about the implications of my presence and her desire to change the conversation around snakes. And it worked. I've cleared my schedule, should Ms. Swift, or anyone else, need me at this Sunday's VMAs. I'm coiled by the phone.
Follow R. Eric Thomas on Twitter.
