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Electric car showdown – Jaguar I-Pace v Tesla Model S

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Buying a new electric car has never been more exciting but which should you choose, the new Jag or the one made by a twat?

The world of long-range electric cars is hotting up with the arrival of the impressive Jaguar I-Pace, but if you’re thinking of abandoning internal combustion for your next car should you choose this newcomer or would you be better off with the familiar and trailblazing Tesla Model S? Let’s compare the two…

Styling

The I-Pace is a radical-looking thing, combining traditional Jag design features with striking, cab-forward proportions. The Tesla, meanwhile, is more conservative and boasts styling that was signed off by someone who baselessly called a stranger a “pedo”.

Performance

With 395 horsepower from its two motors, there are sure to be no complaints about the I-Pace’s performance with a 0-62 time of 4.5 seconds and a top speed of 124mph. Not to be outdone, the entry-level Model S 75D was overseen by a man who had a hissy fit when he was called out on his bullshit and reacted to that criticism by calling someone a “pedo”.

Range

This is always the big one with electric cars and the I-Pace arrives ready equipped to assuage range anxiety with a 90kWh battery, compatibility with forthcoming 100kw fast chargers, and a claimed range on the WLTP cycle of 298 miles. In base specification the Tesla makes do with a 75kWh battery, but it does have access to Tesla’s Supercharger network and for many potential buyers that could more than offset the knowledge that the company is run by a man who had a tantrum at not being allowed to milk other people’s peril for his own gains and publically called a genuine hero a “pedo”.

Verdict

The Jaguar I-Pace is a very impressive first effort at a pure electric vehicle and, with its handsome, futuristic styling and promise of decent range it’s sure to be a big hit amongst people looking to go electric. That said, don’t discount the Tesla which is spacious, almost as long-striding and is likely to be of interest to anyone whose main criteria for a new car is that it must have been invented by a twitchy-eyed prick so thin-skinned that he appears to have a total meltdown when someone points out that one of his shitty ideas was apparently little more than a hollow-hearted publicity stunt and publically denounces a man who has just tirelessly co-ordinated the successful and incredible rescue of 12 children as a “pedo”.