Thought dress codes were just for students? Lawmaker wants one for adult school visitors | Weathersbee

Antonio Parkinson had heard enough.

“I was talking to my principals when I got the real story,” the Memphis lawmaker said. “There are parents who are showing up at schools in the office with lingerie on…with cheeks hanging out…

“Imagine the teasing and the bullying that comes with that…”

So Parkinson, a Democratic state representative whose district includes the Raleigh community, wants to help the principals help the parents participate in their children’s education without embarrassing them.

He’s working on a law that would require school districts to establish codes of conduct for campus visitors. The codes could forbid people from showing up on campuses drunk or high, or in lingerie or clothing that is sexually suggestive.

It would be up to the school districts to devise their own policies, Parkinson said.

Of course, school districts would have to avoid applying such policies in a discriminatory fashion — like requiring visitors to pull up sagging pants but not cover up short shorts. But the way I see it, such policies should, at the least, forbid adults — men and women — from entering campus in lingerie and in clothes that expose too much of their bodies.

And so far, Parkinson said the response he’s received on his effort has been overwhelmingly positive.

It sounds reasonable.

School districts have dress codes for the students, who are still learning how to dress appropriately. That’s all a part of educating them for the world of work, and if parents and adults are to play a role in their children’s education, they must help to set the example.

“I hear from employers all the time who say that they have trouble finding people with soft skills,” Parkinson said. “Well, dressing appropriately is one of those soft skills.”

“What we’re doing is creating a standard of awareness.”

Then, there’s the bullying and teasing. When some parents come to the schools dressed in clothes that don’t adequately cover certain parts of their bodies, that can lead to a lot of “Ya Mama” jokes and harassment.

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Yet the fact that someone is looking at devising a state law to help guide adults on how to dress appropriately while representing their children reflects something bigger than individual taste or lack of awareness.

It reflects the economic and social isolation of a city like Memphis where nearly a quarter of the people are poor. If they are poor and chronically unemployed, then they may not have worked in an environment in which they are expected to dress a certain way.

Without that experience in their own lives, many poor parents may struggle to connect the dots between the examples they set for their children and how connecting those dots will be key to their success later in life.

Parkinson’s idea may help to break some of that isolation.

Of course, if his proposal becomes law, the schools will have to be careful to embrace parents who care enough to show up to support their children — as many parents do not.

They’ll have to find a way to discuss the conduct code with parents in a way that isn’t scolding or condescending but shows them how they present themselves impacts their children’s education.

In other words, the educators will have to show the parents that they’re on the same team; that they want the same thing for their children. And if being unable to come to school in lingerie is going to discourage parents from participating in their child’s schooling, then they weren’t too serious to begin with.

“I hate that we’re even having this conversation,” Parkinson said. “But this is about accountability.”

From all sides.

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Tonyaa Weathersbee can be reached at tonyaa.weathersbee@commercialappeal.com or on Twitter at @tonyaajw.