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The Inner Machinations of the Incredibly Witty Melai Cantiveros
The mother of viral internet memes, Melai's brand of comedy never falters.
by Em Enriquez
Published Jan 8, 2024
Melai Cantiveros isย a big winner, a "valedictorian," and a trueย "kuan."ย
Azu-we, azu-we, azu-we ye ye ye. Azu-we, azu-we, azu-we ye ye ye.
Not to be confused with a ritualistic chant or an exuberant pep rally cheer, such a cantation was uttered by one Melai Cantiveros. As documented on one of her Instagram stories, Melai let out the impromptu lyrics as a way to amuse her youngest daughter Stella, who immediately contorted her body in accordance with the rhythm. Such a phenomenon is a daily occurrence in the Francisco household.
Possessing such disarming vocal prowess is only one piece of proof that Melai is, indeed, a bewitching entity. How else would she be able to make whatever exits her mouth worth its weight in internet meme gold? How else would she be able to emerge victorious from not just one, but two reality shows, and enjoy longevity long after both ventures? How else would she have the likes of Kim Seon Ho, whom she admires dearly, smiling so hard just because of her sincere declamations on the mic?
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Melai Cantiveros for Preview January 2024
Many can elicit a giggle, but only a select few can have an entire nation in stitches just because of their candor. Melai is situated in that elite group, though sheโs just as bewildered as to how she found herself there exactly. โAko talaga, hindi ko alam kung natural [yung humor ko]. Thank you, Lord, kung natural talaga,โ she ruminates. โMagsalita lang ako o gumalaw lang ako, matatawa na [ang mga tao].โ
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Back then, the only audience Melai had for her quips was her tight-knit group of friends. But ever since she became one of Kuya's housemates on Pinoy Big Brother, that small-town girl from General Santos gradually transformed into the countryโs national jester. Every "charing" and "kuan" she lets out effortlessly births a million views and laugh reactions on social media.
After all of these years, people still canโt get enough of Melai. The funny thing is, she doesnโt even need to try.
The Hometown Hero
It all started at home for our resident funny girl. Before she and her kids went viral for their spontaneous song and dance numbersโice cream, anyone?โMelaiโs own childhood was laced with her motherโs melodies.
โNung bata kasi ako, kinakantahan rin ako ng mama ko. Nung naging nanay na rin ako, ginagawa ko na rin sa mga anak ko. Parang naging bonding na namin,โ she narrates. โParang hindi ko naman in-expect na magiging katuwaan โto ng ibang tao. Sobra akong amazed.โ
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Having a funny bone seems to be a common trait in the Cantiveros clan. Melai attests that her knack for comedy developed in a household where laughter was served for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. In her words, โnatural din yung kalokohan [ng parents ko].โ
The GenSan native recalls being placed in the honor section during her elementary school days, much to her perplexion. โHindi naman pang-Section 1 yung utak ko,โ she couldnโt help but quip. โPero feeling ko nag-stay ako sa Section 1 dahil nakakatawa ako.โ
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ON MELAI:ย Dress, P78,500, CAROLINA HERRERA, Greenbelt 5. Heels, P52,500, JIMMY CHOO, Greenbelt 3.
Even if Melai didnโt know the correct answer, she would still raise her hand and instead, offer a comical remark. Itโs better than dead air, right? Her classmates would erupt into chuckles and the teacher would hurriedly shush them. Melai would then seat herself, satisfied with the reactions she garnered.
โDahil natatawa sila, parang nabibigyan ako ng confidence. Feeling ko ang galing ko. Feeling ko napatunayan ko na meron pala akong something. May something pala ako sa utak,โ she says.
This โsomethingโ was what ultimately led Melai to becoming the Big Winner of Pinoy Big Brother: Double Up in 2009. After weeks of daily tasks and around-the-clock surveillance, the โInday Kengkayโ bested over 20 other hopefuls and was launched into a state of national adoration. Looking back, joining the reality show wasnโt originally in her plans.
โAyoko sumali [at first] kasi naging running joke na [sumasali] ka ng PBB para i-ahon yung pamilya mo sa kahirapan,โ she states. Melai expounds that she didnโt want to sign up purely for the chance to uplift her economic status. After all, merely auditioning and possibly making it as a finalist doesnโt ensure success, and in turn, financial security. Those of us who arenโt born celebrities only have 15 minutes of fame, they say. With this in mind, the then 21-year-old wanted to tackle things with a bit more common sense.
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If it werenโt for her barkada, who are still her best friends today, the world wouldnโt have met Melisa Cantiveros. Thanks to their incessant encouragement, she finally went for it. She took a bus to Davao, lined up right before dawn, andย became auditionee #23349 (or โbasta nasa 20,000, ganunโ). โWalang kain-kain talaga. Hindi ka pwedeng lumabas hanggaโt mapanis yung amoy ng bibig mo,โ she candidly recalls. The months of waiting for a callback instilled some doubt in Melai, but luckily enough, she was cast in the show. The rest is history.
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Conquering PBB was Melaiโs launchpad into show business, which is a space she never really saw herself in. Frankly speaking, she didnโt think she had the face to be an artista. โAng mga pangarap ko binase ko sa itsura ko. So, parang nag-pass-by na [ang pagiging artista] sa mga pangarap ko,โ she says.
Melai initially saw herself becoming a housewife or maybe even a cashier, but never a celebrity. Thatโs why the fame she revels in now is not simply a dream come trueโin her terms, itโs a โsuper duper magnificent dream come true.โ
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In all honesty, she wouldโve been happy to enjoy at least two years in the industry. โNatupad ko na yung pangarap ko eh,โ she says. But as fate would have it, Melaiโs career would span over a decade and counting. Numerous appearances on the small screen, which includes a hosting gig alongside entertainment legends Regine Velasquez and Jolina Magdangal, would get added to her rรฉsumรฉ.
โHanggang ngayon, dinidiretso pa rin ni Lord [yung blessings]. Kaya masasabi ko na, โLord, is this real?โ Kasi siya talaga ang nagbibigay nito. Hindi ko โto plano, pero plano niya to para sa akin,โ she expresses.
The Viral Sensation
Indicated in that grand plan was Melaiโs titular role in Maโam Chief: Shakedown in Seoul, a comedy-action film produced by PULP Studios. The actress plays to her strengths, portraying a police officer who, quite comically, chases down a fugitive hiding in South Korea. Partially produced in the land of Hallyu, the movie featured cameos from Lee Seung Gi and a number of K-pop acts.
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You could only imagine how overwhelmed Melai was to bag such a role. In a way, she kind of manifested it, having spent most of her time in quarantine binge-watching action titles and Korean dramas.
โTotoo ba ito?โ Melai remembers asking when she was offered the project. โYes, ikaw talaga ang napili ng tadhana,โ she was told by PULP Studios COO Happee Sy Go.
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ON MELAI: Dress, P26,898, FIORUCCI, Univers, Greenbelt 3. Heels, P76,500, JIMMY CHOO x JEAN PAUL GAULTIER, Greenbelt 3.ย Hat, YANA KALAW x HA.Mร, Instagram/yanakalawstudios.
A month after the movie premiered, Melai found herself in another state of disbeliefโOur girl was attending theย Asia Artists Awards, inches away from her beloved oppasย and her daughter Melaโs favorite girl group NewJeans.
Happee, whom Melai fondly refers to as โInang Reyna,โ said it was imperative for her to attend the ceremony. Upon entering the Philippine Arena, she was directed to sit beside two Korean actors, which she didnโt expect. At the other end of the stadium, she spotted fellow Filipino acts Kathryn Bernardo and Ben & Benย and decided to make a run for it. But it was too late. She was asked to remain where she was seated as hostess Wonyoung approached her with a mic and cue cards. Weโve all probably seen what went down by now.
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โAttending AAA is a very honor. I feel like I am the first honor, a valedictorian in attending AAA. And itโs the best, prestigious award. I cannot believe this is happening,โ she uttered. One can tell how nervous she was to be put on the spot, but it was also impossible to ignore the crowd going livid with pride. Clips of her hilarious exchange with Wonyoung quickly made rounds as a new soundbite was born.
Later that night, Melai had everyone from SB19 to Stray Kids guffawing as she received her Best Actor trophy for Maโam Chief. โIf someone questions why I have an award, donโt worry I question, too,โ she opened her speech, eliciting more laughter. Gratitude was just pouring out of her, and so were the humorous phrases that slid right off of her tongue.
โMy heart is veryโฆ kuanโฆ the best,โ she continued. โI think itโs because God moves in mysterious waysโฆ To my family, we will serve the Lord!โ
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โGrabe yung kaba ko. Mabuti na lang nilabanan ko,โ Melai shares to Preview as she recounts the moment. โMabuti na lang tumawa yung mga tao, dahil kung hindi sila tumawaโฆ I think, I'm sorry, Iโm signing off. Charing!โ
Melaiย is unapologetic in admitting that her English is not the best, so to address an international audience, she did what she does best, which was to make people laugh. โMapagtagumpayan ko lang ito, hindi lang ako mahimatay, okay na ako,โ she says. If we were to refer to the multitudes of reposts and the general buzz around her name at the time, she was pretty successful with her goal.
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Virality has shadowed Melai throughout her stay in the industry. She could just be preparing chicken nuggets or ordering a blueberry cheesecake and sheโd already have another hit on her hands. When you think about it, itโs just another 30-something Pinay mom going about her business, and yet it becomes comedy gold.
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ON MELAI: Dress, SHERIKO SARINAS, Instagram/sherikosarinas_official. Bag, ยฃ395 (approximately P27,894), SIMONE ROCHA, simonerocha.com. Hat, YANA KALAW x HA.Mร, Instagram/yanakalawstudios.
โHindi namin kasi yun kalokohan, yun lang yung daily life namin,โ Melai states as she tries to explain the phenomenon. She credits the netizens who are amused by her and her family for crafting these โMelai-isms.โ The reality show alumna alludes to the process of a screenwriter coming up with a plot.
โParang silang naging writer ng PBB. Ginagawan nila kami ng kwento. Kasi sa amin, normal lang naman [yung mga ginagawa namin]. Sila ang mga writer ng buhay namin,โ Melai puts it. โTawang-tawa kami. Buang talaga itong mga โto. Talagang tuwang-tuwa sila sa amin.โ
But with virality also comes the naysayers who arenโt so fond of Melaiโs quirks. Some critique her for being โOAโ at times, expecting a certain polish for someone of her tenureย as a celebrity. Sheโs more than open to these criticisms at the end of the day. Again, sheโs just being herself, and sometimes, that ruffles some feathers. โSa sarili ko yun eh. Ako talaga yun eh. Hindi ko talaga mapipigilan yun. Hindi ko talaga mapi-please lahat,โ she firmly says.
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Some individuals canโt help themselves from taking a jab at her appearance, attempting to use her โfunny faceโ against her. Typically, being told that you have a face for comedy is a backhanded compliment. However, Melai is actually glad to even be considered a comedian in the first place.
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โProud pa nga ako dahil yun naman talaga ang larangan ko. Parang doon ako na-align eh,โ she expresses. The genre is not easy to hone, so being placed in the same category as the likes of Pokwang, Eugene Domingo, and Vice Ganda is the highest form of flattery for her. โNaa-amaze ako โpag sinasabihan ako na [mukha akong komedyante] kasi hindi basta-basta ang pagiging komedyante,โ she puts it.
The Chosen One
It can be argued that comedy is one of the most complex forms of entertainment. Itโs easier to make people cry than it is to make them laugh. One part ideation, and two parts delivery, the jokes you come up with are futile if they arenโt expressed in the right way. Melai, perhaps, serves as a prime example of this practice.
The way her eyebrows furrow and the directions her limbs go into coincide with the remarks she blurts out. Often, she puts on her signature Melai face, which entails exaggeratingly lifting her cheeks and displaying her front set of teeth. Her body language elevates her quips, guaranteeing a cacophony of cackles to ensue.
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But Melaiโs mastery of her craft shows even without any visual aid. She could just be a TikTok sound, or in the case of our interview, a voice on the other end of a shaky phone call. I spoke to her during the awkward pocket of timeย in the days between Christmas and New Yearโs. She was back home in GenSan, fully in her element as chickens cockle-doodle-dooโd in the background. After such an eventful 2023, momshie Mels was taking some much-deserved downtime.
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โ[I feel so much] gratitude,โ she says when asked how her vacation is going. โSiyempre, hindi na bumabata yung parents ko, and may nararamdaman na rin sila. So, alam mo yun, ine-enjoy namin ang time na kasama sila. Wala na talaga dapat i-waste na time.โ
Now with a buzzing career and two mini-me's toย raise, Melai sentimentally looks back on life before she became a big winner. โNami-miss ko yung time na [lagi koโng] kasama ang pamilya ko. Yung kaguluhan, yung paunahan kami sa pagkain. Noon talaga nagkakaubusan kami. Pero ngayon, thank you Lord, kahit papaano [hindi na kami nagkakaubusan],โ she reminisces.
Before all of the fame and virality, Melai would describe herself as very carefree, or in Bisaya, โkiat kiat.โ She admittedly misses the times when no one would bat an eye if she were to burst out in laughter in public. With no cameras directed toward her, the life she led back then was much, much simpler.
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Though, as appealing as it may be to retreat, Melai knows why she continues to be part of show business. โPina-stay pa rin ako ni Lord sa sitwasyon na 'to kasi meron akong responsibility. Meron'g reason kung bakit nandito pa rin ako sa show biz,โ she contemplates.
โMaraming tao ang naha-happy sa akin. Iba yung happiness na nabibigay ko sa kanila eh. Pag nagpapa-picture sila saโkin, doon ko narere-realize na pwede ko ipagpalit yung privacy ko,โ says Melai. After more than a decade in the scene, sheโs grown to be at ease with where she is. And with thatย comes an understanding of what she can offer to the people who have come to fall in love with her.
โYung happiness na nabibigay ko sa mga tao, hindi basta-basta yun eh. Parang forever na nilang dadalhin yun. Baka may problema silang pinagdadaanan na [natutulungan] ko dahil sa [pagpapatawa] ko.โ
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This proclivity to make people happy is only one of the reasons why Melai continues to thrive in the biz. First and foremost is her faith, and how she offers all the glory to the One above. โAng alam ko lang talaga, nandyan si Lord. Tina-touch ni Lord yung mga tao para ilagay ako sa mga proyekto na [meron ako],โ she expresses. โYung respect, gratitude, contentment, humility, at yung pakikisama ang mga main ingredients talaga sa journey ko dito sa show business.โ
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It all starts and ends at home for Melai. You can take the girl out of GenSan, but you can never take GenSan out of the girl. All it takes for her to stay grounded is a constant reminder of where she came from, which isn't hard to come by considering how flamboyant her entire family is.
โMasaya kasi talaga kami noon kahit [na hindi pa kami nakakaluwag sa] buhay. Lalo na ngayon na may binibigay si Lord na blessings,โ Melai explains. โSo, hindi ko talaga makakalimutan [kung sino ako]. Nandyan yung mga kaibigan ko, mga pinsan ko, at ang asawa ko na always nagre-remind sa akin kung sino talaga ang totoong ako.โ
And that, perhaps, is her most prized secretโthat there is none to begin with. There are no magic spells or witchesโ brews involved in the captivating quality of Melai Cantiveros. Sheโs still that loud, boisterous, and vibrant young lady from GenSan, albeit equipped with a more serious side as a parent. Every joke, every facial expression, and every viral internet moment are spawned by the same person she wasย 10 or so years ago. Whether or not Melai was born with her natural wit is but an open-ended question.
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Melai will always just be Melai. All we have to do is keep rolling on the floor, laughing until our guts just canโt take it anymore.
Produced and Styled by The Preview Team
Photographers: Cenon Norial III and Mav Bernardo
Creative Director: Bacs Arcebal
Editor-in-Chief: Marj Ramos-Clemente
Production: Reg Rodriguez
Fashion: Reg Rodriguez,ย Leika Golez
Makeup: Jake Galvez
Hairstyling: Jan Edrosolan
Nails: ELINAILS
Production Design: Paul Jatayna, assisted by Bruce Venida
Story: Em Enriquez
Videos: Jana Jodloman
Social Media: Jamie Lou Briones
Special thanks to Nina Ferrer, Jio Baldesimo of Univers Greenbelt 3,ย Pacific Bay Eats
*Editor's Note: No animals were harmed in the production of this cover
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